Tongan Etiquette: Tonga Customs & Traditions

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What to Wear in Tonga

Tongans wear a conservative dress with cultural clothing wrapped around their waists, such as pandanus mats (ta’ovala) or women may also wear girdles (kiekie). Although this is not expected of tourists, ta’ovala and kiekie are considered formal attire for going to church, government work or just about any formal event.

How to Dress in Public

For visitors, while it’s acceptable to wear just about whatever you want in tourist accommodation, be mindful of how you dress in public. Respectful dress is important to Tongans, so try to avoid wearing revealing clothing, especially in villages. Wearing all black means that you are mourning in the Tongan culture, so try to avoid wearing all black if this is not the case for you.

Swimwear in Tonga

Swimwear should be confined to your accommodation’s beach or swimming pool. Tongans swim fully clothed so cover up swimwear with a T-shirt/rash vest and shorts when on public beaches or swimming attractions such as Anahulu Cave.

What to Wear for Church

When going to a church service, both men and women must cover their knees and shoulders. It’s also respectful to wear more formal clothing, such as a shirt for men or a dress for women. You should not wear a hat in church, as it has significant meaning. Find out more about church etiquette in the 10 Best Churches in Tonga for Visitors.

Laws Against Dress in Tonga

It is illegal for both men and women to go topless in public. However, the law does not apply to tourist accommodation.

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Sunday Rules in Tonga

Much etiquette for respecting the local customs in Tonga revolves around the Sunday experience. Sunday is a day of rest in Tonga, where it’s illegal to do business transactions, to play sports/exercise and to do most chores.

This means that most of the country shuts down on a Sunday, with the exception of essential services like hospitals, as well as very particular tourism businesses such as resorts, including their restaurants and activities.

If you are not staying in a resort or are outside of a tourist area, note that it is generally not acceptable to go swimming, kayaking, do laundry, go running, etc. On some islands like Vava’u, it is even illegal to go sightseeing. This also will mean that you won’t be able to buy food from stores, so prepare in advance. No public travel services operate on a Sunday.

Learn about some things to do on a Sunday, as well as the nuanced rules between island groups, in the 10 Things to Do in Tonga on a Sunday.

Prayers in Tonga

On the subject of religion, saying a prayer before every meal is standard in Tonga. Usually, one person at the table, whether it’s at a restaurant or family home, will say a prayer. So if you are sharing a meal with Tongans, don’t tuck into your meal before a prayer has been said.

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Rules in the Home in Tonga

If you’re lucky enough to visit a Tongan home, there are a few more rules of etiquette to observe:

• Remove shoes before entering a home (unless told it is Ok to keep them on)
• Remove shoes before sitting on a floor mat
• If you’re invited for dinner, note that it is customary for guests to eat first; the host family may eat what’s left afterwards so don’t feel obligated to eat it all
• Bringing store-bought food goods is acceptable as a token of appreciation for staying at a Tongan’s home or being invited for dinner (as is money and goods that can’t normally be obtained without money – something of the value of  TOP$20-$40 is adequate)
• It is common for a speech to be given by both host and guest during more formal or unusual visits
• It is common to say a prayer or ‘Grace’ before eating.

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Other Etiquette Rules for Tonga

While not fitting into a specific category, these are some other local customs and rules to keep in mind when visiting Tonga.

• Tongans can be more reserved than what’s experienced by tourists elsewhere in the Pacific, so it’s best to engage locals politely
• Displaying anger or frustration is bad practice in Tonga – remember to “keep face”
• Things run a little slow in Tonga, have patience and embrace “Tonga Time“
• It is not customary or expected to tip in the hospitality or tourism industry but is appreciated
• The exception for tipping is during a cultural show, where bank notes are typically tucked into the performer’s clothes while they are performing
• Respect for elders is highly valued, so be sure to show deference and address them with appropriate titles, such as “sir” or “madam”
• Haggling is a no-no
• Kava is usually reserved for men only, but women visitors are usually welcome to join kava circles (faikava)
• Don’t do drugs or deal drugs in Tonga
• When driving, drive on the left side of the road (see How to Drive in Tonga)
• When driving, give way to vehicles turning right
• The legal drinking age is 18 years old.